An Ordinary Day...

Wednesday, April 12th started off as an ordinary day. The alarm sounded off at 6:00 a.m. like it always did. Reggie did his work day morning ritual, showering, grooming, selecting a suit and accessorizing with the perfect accents for Read more

Why are some people mean?

Why are some people mean? I'm not talking about a little mean, but bazaar, go out of their way to be mean. Recently I've encountered a few mean people, I remind myself that these situations will make me a stronger Read more

Maldives

Our last trip of 2016 was to the Maldives. Last year was one full of excursions, We traveled to Cameroon, Paris, Bali, Hawaii, New Orleans, New York, Chicago, Lake Tahoe, Atlanta, Napa, San Francisco, Dubai, and I must say Read more

Quote

It's okay to venture out of your comfort zone... Lately I've been doing it quite often. This weekend is going to be one of renewal, my personal Super Bowl. What are your plans? I will be working today and tomorrow. Happy Read more

Do you enjoy yourself?

Both of my kids are in New York, my son is in school in the Hudson Valley and my daughter is living in Brooklyn and working. So we are officially empty nesters, and have been so for a while Read more

relationship

24TH WEDDING ANNIVERSARY

Posted on by Gigi in My Life, Thoughts 10 Comments

Last week I celebrated my 24th wedding anniversary, unfortunately it was the same day of my brother-n-law Jimmy’s untimely passing. We flew up to Stanford Medical Center to join family in spending our last moments together, showering Jimmy with prayers and song. It was a sad day, one I will never forget, and  I pray I never have to experience my own child dying before my eyes.

Wedding Day july 23, 1989

Wedding Day july 23, 1989

We eloped to the island of Kauai and had a simple ceremony witnessed by my dear friend Blaine and her then husband Bob. The  small chapel was filled with strangers that Reggie recruited from the hotel. I was worried that no one was going to be there, so this was his solution, run around the hotel inviting everyone to come to our wedding unbeknown to me of course.  This was Reggie’s second marriage and at the time we felt it was best to have a low key ceremony, of course the inner bride is alive and well inside of me and is jones-ing for a 25th wedding vow renewal next year with all the trimmings.

Reggie & Gigi

Reggie & Gigi

 

Fast forward 24 years; we have been blessed with a daughter and a son, we have both lost siblings, survived bankruptcy, abuse from the IRS, stroke, acquired a new office 100 miles away, fishetarian, vegetarian, vegan, raw vegan, a kitchen remodel, plus or minus 15 pounds, reading glasses, interesting family dynamics, marathons, triathlons, the end of the long silky perm era, and oh I can’t forget menopause and we are STILL TOGETHER!

 Reggie & Gigi

Reggie & Gigi

Our marriage is very similar to training for a triathlon. Swimming, biking, and running are the events you have to somewhat master in order to complete the triathlon, in marriage you also have to participate in all the parts, you can’t pick and choose , and expect to finish the race. There will be some parts you like and some you will loathe. You may at times get discouraged and want to quit, but you know just like that early morning ocean swim, once you get wet you are fine. When your training is consistent, you become stronger, just like in marriage when you are slacking in a few areas you have to work harder or else before you know it you will just settle for mediocracy accepting “whatever” as your norm.

Malibu Tri 2011

Malibu Tri 2011

Crossing the triathlon finish line, you are overwhelmed with a sense of accomplishment, the excitement trickles through your entire body, you quickly forget about the hours you put in, the setbacks and injuries. In marriage you have to keep “training” for those peaks, and remember the “dating” phase and DO what you DID then, that made you want to close the deal. The “training” is a lifelong commitment that can be truly rewarding, so if you have been a little lack, dust off those running shoes and go for a spin around the track.

Reggie & Gigi

Reggie & Gigi

XOXO,

GIGI

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NOTES on FRIENDSHIPS and OTHER SITUATIONS

Posted on by Gigi in friendship, Thoughts, Uncategorized 1 Comment
Friends

Friends

I used to think commonality was the key to a lasting friendship. I believed that some how “like” interests were a sort of permabond adhesive that nothing could dissolve. Granted many times similar interests are what attract us to another person but being able to reveal your true self with no judgement is really important for longevity. Relationships are so complex and those that stand the test of time don’t happen magically.

sadness

In my many years on the planet I have had my ration of break ups, and they are never easy, especially if you are the break-up-ee as opposed to the break-up-or. All breakups are difficult whether it is a lover, husband, friend, or sometimes even a family member. No one likes to feel rejected, and most of the time regardless of the reason someone walks away feeling this way.

Zapatos

shoe friends…

I will soon celebrate 24 years of marriage on July 23, I have been married long enough to witness many divorces, engagements, marriages, long term dating situations, 2nd, 3rd, 4th marriages, a few “love at first sight”, online dating unions, some successful blind dates, and some awful breakups. For me time was always the best healer of a broken heart, moving forward and remembering the good experiences that brought you together, instead of focusing on the negative factors and trying to figure out the “why”.  My marriage is constantly shifting, every 5 or so years our family dynamic changes, a child goes away to school, a child comes back home, career change, financial problems, extended family situations, health challenges, menopause, man-o-pause, any given period some challenge presents itself and we have to work together to find a solution.

GIGI FEED BODY & SOUL

GIGI FEED BODY & SOUL

I read this piece “Break Ups” on Cindy Fernandez’s blog. In the piece there is a passage by Oriah Mountain Dreamer that really spoke to me. The author says:

“I want to know if you have touched the center of your sorrow, if you have been opened by life’s betrayals or have become shriveled and closed from fear of further pain. I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it or fade it, or fix it. “

Read the entire piece here.

I have so much admiration for Cindy, whom I met a couple of years ago, she changed my yoga “relationship”,  transformed it from an occasional workout to a lifestyle. I was enlightnened, humbled, inspired and most of all challenged, all at the same time. I always left her class in a state of pure bliss, “open to infinite possibilities”. I miss her so much.  My yoga journey is still in its infancy stage, I enjoy my  tiny breakthroughs here and there.

558634_3815716349898_1591086403_n

She has since relocated to San Francisco, spreading her yoga love all over the bay area, check out her schedule here.

What’s your take on friendships? Breakups?

Xoxo,

Gigi

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Friends How Many of us Have them?

Posted on by Gigi in Well-Being 15 Comments

Friends how many of us have them

Friends

Ones we can depend on

Friends

How many of us have them

Friends

Before we go any futher, lets be

Friends

                                                                                                                                                                                Whodini

Friends

I read an article in the Sunday New York Times, a few weeks ago about how difficult it is to make friends as we get older. I reflected on my own friend journey as an adult, and thought about when did I meet most of them. When you really think about how many “new” friends do you have and how many friends do you have from childhood? Is this friend thing different for guys? Reggie has a few acquaintances, his reluctancy to come on board with technology has made communicating a bit of a challenge, he is starting to text a bit, rarely checks email, and goes on facebook occasionally. His friend circle consists of guys he sees on the basketball court, one running partner and one brother that he talks to on the phone quite often.

I on the other hand am very social and enjoy interacting with with my girlfriends. My friendships have shaped me into the person I am, helped me to grow and at times really tested my limits and patience. I met my friend that I have know the longest when I was 10 and we have remained in contact for more years than I care to remember. High school (see my post below) was a difficult period in my life, but thanks to facebook I have reconnected with many of them. During college a few of my long term friendships blossomed, women I am still close with today, one of which I met my husband through. Friends that I have 20 plus years of history with are like mini marriages, you have gone through so much together, the good and bad and the ugly. They know things about you that you don’t even want to remember, they met the “jacked” boyfriend that you were crazy about that newer friends just heard about.

Friends

Moving on to adulthood, living in LA, working various jobs, living in roommate situations, I picked up a couple of  more lifers, some of which currently live in different parts of the country, but friends non the less.

Once I got married and my daughter was born my circle was filled with other stroller pushers. Between mommy and me groups, spouses of Reggie’s colleagues, social clubs, Jack and Jill, mothers from school, friends from interior design school, sister-n-laws, and neighbors, there was a friend explosion. I made the most friends during this period. Soon my children were developing their own friends and sometimes mothers that I bonded with, my children now were not as close with those kids, causing for some awkward times. And kids can be so honest with “I don’t like her, mommy!”.

Young Friends

Currently I am fortunate to have a sisterhood of women in my life who I admire, who inspire me to be my best, women who it is okay to agree to disagree. Like all relationships sometimes friendships are challenged, or interests change and the relationship slowly fades away. You may have to reflect when a friendship ends, and say that friend was in my life for this reason and I am grateful for the moments we shared. The glue that holds my friendships together vary like night and day, some love shopping, some never shop, some live each day to workout, others are weekend warriors, some are active in their churches, and others can’t recall the last time they have been, some are married, some are not, some have children, some eat ribs and some eat carrots, some ski, and some do ballroom dancing, some do yoga, we are all different, but we enjoy each others company just the same. I love my friends, I would be lost without each and everyone of you.

Cartoon

 

Do you find it difficult to make friends as an adult? I would love to hear your friend stories.

Xoxo,

Gigi

 

 

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