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good marriage

25 Tips for a Happy Marriage

Posted on July 22, 2014 by Gigi in My Life 6 Comments
Wedding Day july 23, 1989 1 week before 30

Wedding Day july 23, 1989 Kauai

25 years ago I said “I Do” to my soulmate for life. We have been through a lot together, I have experienced the happiest moments in my life with this man, and some of the saddest, birthed 2 children, traveled around the world, ran 4 marathons, 1 triathlon, biked around the big island of Hawaii, baked more brownies than I care to remember, raised a few furry children, got involved in a pyramid scheme, made money , lost money, turned vegan and shared lots of laughs together.

25 years later July 23, 2014

25 years later July 23, 2014

 

As I reflect on the past 25 years, I thought about why am I still crazy about this man? I came up with my list  of 25 tips for a happy marriage. I’m not an expert, but these are things that have worked for us.

Not in any particular order:

#1. FORGIVE and FORGET.

# 2. Live YOUR version of a “Love Story”.

# 3. Love yourself, but don’t be Selfish.

Hubby Reggie

Hubby Reggie

# 4. Make your OWN family traditions…Love your extended families, but establish a few rituals of your own.

# 5. Evolve and “be a creature like no other” embrace your own changes as well as your partner’s- being stagnant is not interesting or attractive.

# 6. Prepare “real” food with all your heart and soul. There is something sensuous about preparing food for your lover.

Reggie & Gigi

Reggie & Gigi

# 7. Always DATE- It is easy to get into a rut, but make it happen, get a sitter, do whatever you have to do in order to spend time as a couple.

# 8. Commit to the journey, the ride may will get rocky, but HOLD ON!!!

Gigi & Reggie

Gigi & Reggie

# 9. Have FAITH and BELIEVE in something.

# 10. Nurture your family ie. your children, but don’t forget each other.

# 11. Work at your marriage and the magic will happen- No Work No Magic.

I would say yes again...

I would say yes again…

# 12. Prioritize – What is really important? Don’t get it twisted…

# 13. Remember ROMANCE CAN LAST…don’t pay attention to the cynics, non-believers and those that are bitter.

# 14. Indulge each other in WHATEVER -at least sometimes.

Happy

Have Fun pretend to get married again …

# 15. Celebrate each other…birthdays, anniversaries, Valentine’s or just because.

#16. Be in “touch” and communicate-be available for one another-don’t be elusive- and TOUCH each other…

#17. LISTEN, LISTEN & LISTEN and THINK, THINK & THINK and then SPEAK SPEAK & SPEAK…

love this one

love this one

# 18. Travel near and far, especially places where you don’t speak the language, get out and explore this world we live in.

#19.  Make your house a home- create a comforting space  that you both look forward to.

# 20. Be desirable for each other- be the best version of “you”, look pretty, smell fresh, take care of your body, groom yourself, wear pretty lingerie or not…

Love this man

Love this man

# 21. CARE for each other…Be there when your mate is down, physically, mentally, financially…just be there.

# 22. Learn to savor moments–the older I get, the more I know that tomorrow is not promised.

# 23. Don’t let things get old and tired–literally and figuratively — you are in control.

Laugh

Laugh

# 24. Laugh, Laugh and LAUGH–Don’t be so serious.

# 25. Eat Love, Drink Love, Live Love, and most of all MAKE LOVE!

US

US

Here is a behind the scene video of my anniversary  photo shoot that my talented son surprised me with…

As I celebrate my Silver Anniversary–I wish all you much love…

XOXO.

Gigi

 

 

 

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24TH WEDDING ANNIVERSARY

Posted on July 31, 2013 by Gigi in My Life, Thoughts 10 Comments

Last week I celebrated my 24th wedding anniversary, unfortunately it was the same day of my brother-n-law Jimmy’s untimely passing. We flew up to Stanford Medical Center to join family in spending our last moments together, showering Jimmy with prayers and song. It was a sad day, one I will never forget, and  I pray I never have to experience my own child dying before my eyes.

Wedding Day july 23, 1989

Wedding Day july 23, 1989

We eloped to the island of Kauai and had a simple ceremony witnessed by my dear friend Blaine and her then husband Bob. The  small chapel was filled with strangers that Reggie recruited from the hotel. I was worried that no one was going to be there, so this was his solution, run around the hotel inviting everyone to come to our wedding unbeknown to me of course.  This was Reggie’s second marriage and at the time we felt it was best to have a low key ceremony, of course the inner bride is alive and well inside of me and is jones-ing for a 25th wedding vow renewal next year with all the trimmings.

Reggie & Gigi

Reggie & Gigi

 

Fast forward 24 years; we have been blessed with a daughter and a son, we have both lost siblings, survived bankruptcy, abuse from the IRS, stroke, acquired a new office 100 miles away, fishetarian, vegetarian, vegan, raw vegan, a kitchen remodel, plus or minus 15 pounds, reading glasses, interesting family dynamics, marathons, triathlons, the end of the long silky perm era, and oh I can’t forget menopause and we are STILL TOGETHER!

Reggie & Gigi

Reggie & Gigi

Our marriage is very similar to training for a triathlon. Swimming, biking, and running are the events you have to somewhat master in order to complete the triathlon, in marriage you also have to participate in all the parts, you can’t pick and choose , and expect to finish the race. There will be some parts you like and some you will loathe. You may at times get discouraged and want to quit, but you know just like that early morning ocean swim, once you get wet you are fine. When your training is consistent, you become stronger, just like in marriage when you are slacking in a few areas you have to work harder or else before you know it you will just settle for mediocracy accepting “whatever” as your norm.

Malibu Tri 2011

Malibu Tri 2011

Crossing the triathlon finish line, you are overwhelmed with a sense of accomplishment, the excitement trickles through your entire body, you quickly forget about the hours you put in, the setbacks and injuries. In marriage you have to keep “training” for those peaks, and remember the “dating” phase and DO what you DID then, that made you want to close the deal. The “training” is a lifelong commitment that can be truly rewarding, so if you have been a little lack, dust off those running shoes and go for a spin around the track.

Reggie & Gigi

Reggie & Gigi

XOXO,

GIGI

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